#2 What is Depression anyway?
Essentially it’s a mental health disorder - characterised by persistent sadness and a loss of interest or pleasure in activities.
Along with The Big Sad, and not caring about anything anymore, Depression also comes along to fuck us up with a range of emotional and physical problems - we’ll get to those soon.
So, how do I sum up depression?
It’s a big fuckery to be honest.
Suddenly, or maybe not so suddenly, your outlook on life changes. The things you once looked forward to now just seem shitty, unlikely, boring even?
The people you love, don’t worry you do still love them, you kinda just can’t feel it anymore - at the moment.
Depression affects your body, mind and the voice in your head, all turning negative and worrysome.
Often - or in my case at least - it comes with “reasons” why you’re sad, and when you’ll start feeling better.
My “reasons” I was sad were:
oh I’ll feel better when I have some money in the bank
when I am in a good flat,
when I live with my friends,
when I sort out my degree,
when I come out …
But when those things sorted themselves out and I was still miserable - that’s when I knew it was time to head to the doctor for some professional help.
In your life, are you justifying your mood based on an external situation?
Like oh once this is done, I’ll feel fine. Once I have that job, that holiday, that house, that relationship - I’ll be happy.
It was a shock for me that I couldn’t solve what was on the inside by curating the “perfect” outside.
What are you waiting for to be happy again?
Will getting there really fix the little voice in your head?
Do you maybe need to talk to someone about working on your mental health before you get to that space?
It’s the 7th of July 2025 and I’ve been working on this project in secret for a long time. What’s stopped me?
Mainly because this is what my voice sounds like in my head …
“um who do you think you are starting a place to talk about depression?
Cringe
Leave it to the professionals
You should just leave depression in your past and move on
Do you really think people are going to read this and feel less alone
Why do you think people would use the tools that are on here, because you and science said so? Grow up”
You know, fun little lines like that running through my mind.
But - just because it’s a thought in your brain, doesn’t mean it’s true.
So Bren’s being bold (hi i’m bren)
and here’s to the start of …..
“The Anti-Depression Club”
As always, I’m proud of you for staying alive,
talk again soon,
love bren
xx
